Probably one of the hardest moral dilemmas for any considerate Punter is when a companion one has seen a few times just vanishes.
There are ladies who do just stop out of the blue, but if one has seen a particular lady and there is not been any hint of it, surely it is only natural to feel a degree of concern for her welfare but what is the correct course of action to take?
Of course every lady is entitled to her privacy and her private life and can decide to stop or move away. No-one has any obligation to tell even her regular clients. However, any gent who has seen a lady even just a few times and has an ounce of decency about him will surely still be concerned. The question then is what to do?
No-one wants to over react or to launch a search party, but equally, I do not believe many decent gents would just shrug their shoulders and wash their hands.
I had one occasion about a year after I first started, where a lady I had seen three times did suddenly vanish off the scene. As far as I am aware, she only had a profile listed on TEB (topescortbook.com) and a couple of weeks after I last saw her, she stopped logging in.
She had told me about a few family issues she had faced, so I did think she may have had to go away, but I became concerned when she did not log in after a month.
At the time, I did not know of some of the forums where ladies post, so I did not know what to do . In the end I sent an email on Adultwork, but never it was never read and she did not log back in. However, it did play on my mind for a long time and I just hoped she was ok.
What to do if an escort vanished?
To be totally honest, I cannot say I know what the correct course of action is! I totally respect any lady’s privacy and I would never wish to pry. Equally, I would never wish it to seem like I do not care.
I guess each of us has to make our own decisions depending on how well we know the lady. For example, one could contact any ladies who one knows is a mutual acquaintance of the lady or duos with her or one can send an email or text to just ask if the lady is ok.
Personally, I would not advocate going round to the lady’s premises. Much as one might feel one knows the lady and one’s intentions may be honourable, in truth, there may be many areas of the lady’s life one is not aware of and such actions could cause more problems.
If the situation were such to cause great concern, I would always say the first port of call always should be the police. Yes, I know, we all are precious about our anonymity, but if the lady’s welfare were in danger then this overrides any other concerns.
I’m thinking…If the lady is not an independent but works with an agency, will I be able to contact her or at least send her an email after she disappeared? Maybe Ok if I have a good relationship with the agency… in that case that might be an advantage to book escort from an agency.
Much as a gent may have his concerns if a lady disappears, how do ladies feel if a client vanishes?
I always feel for ladies, as us guys have it easy: If we want to contact a lady, we can! Discretion makes it much harder for a lady to contact a client, unless he has given express consent for the lady to make proactive contact.
Several ladies have told me how concerned they have been when clients they have seen regularly have suddenly stopped seeing them and they have not heard from them again. Of course, much as a lady has her right to privacy and to stop if she wishes, so does a gent. Indeed, he may just have decided to not see the lady again.
I imagine it can feel hurtful if a client does not come back, but it can be for a variety of reasons. A lady may also have concern for the gent if his silence is out of character.
I have had both approved and unsolicited contact. As far as the unsolicited contact went, a couple of ladies were clearly fishing for bookings or wondering why I had not seen them again (and they might well wonder!). However, I have received emails or texts from those I know well if I have been off the radar due to illness or work, wondering how I was.
I was discussing this issue a while back with one of my closest buddies and we both said if something major ever happened, we would endeavour to make contact at some point and let them know the situation and I would certainly want those I see to know I am ok or what has happened. Not sure what I would do though if I ever had the close encounter with the under side of London bus one lady once promised me!
I know in our culture we do not like to discuss the worst, but I would hate to think the ladies I see think I was just pissed off with them.
The secretive nature of the client and companion relationship does make it hard to deal with issues such as the sudden vanishing of either party, but it does not mean one will not feel concerned about someone. Clearly, the better the parties know each other, the greater the concern would be, but also the easier it is to have an agreed system in place.
For those who do not know someone well, they could always contact one of the Escort forums mentioned earlier and ask if any of the ladies know what has happened or what one should do.
Discretion always come very high on the list, but also so does one’s concern for the other party. However, at the end of the day, sometimes we just have to accept the secretive nature of the scene means we may never know what has happened.